February 21st, 2025 by The Rat

To my pals in Mrs. Walle’s class– it was so much fun to blog with you!  I’m sad to say goodbye (sniffle!  sob!) but it’s time to give my ratty paws a rest and go on vacation.  I’ve been thinking I should try to improve my skiing, you know?  Because maybe, just maybe, if I work very very hard, I will be picked to compete in the next Rodent Olympics!!  What do you think?  Is it even possible?

So here I am at Ratspen, a great place for an aspiring Rat Olympian to train.  Do you like my new snow goggles?  And my striped scarf that covers my perky ears?  (Rodent ears get cold easily, you know.)

One of the best things about Ratspen is that there are NO CATS HERE.  I guess they don’t like snow very much.  (Plus, I’ve never yet seen a cat who could ski.)

I had such a great time blogging with all of you, but now I must bid you a sweet rodent farewell… how you brightened my gloomy, ratty days!  Take care, be kind to any rodents you meet, and do yourselves a favor– WATCH OUT FOR CATS!!

February 20th, 2025 by The Rat

Well, I had a lot of exercise, this week!  I was so tired after all that swimming, all I wanted to do was find a good book, and read until I fell asleep.

So I scampered right up the library steps and onto the desk, and (being very rodently polite) I said, “Yo, library lady!  How about a good bedtime story?  What would you recommend for a rat?”

She smiled and said she had the perfect book for me.  So I took it home, got all snuggly in my jammies, and opened it up.

But oh my gosh, I can’t believe it!  This is a SCARY book!  I mean, seriously… Where the Wild Rats Are?   Is this really the kind of thing grownups think we should be reading before bed?  What if I dream of monsters?

Have YOU ever read a really scary book?  If you did, how did you get to sleep afterwards?

I think all those people who keep saying reading is great, reading is fun, reading is important, blah blah blah, should add something else… READING CAN BE DANGEROUS!

February 19th, 2025 by The Rat

Hi again, everybody!  Thanks for all the good suggestions about new sports to try.  Today I went to the aquarium with Emmy and all of a sudden I had a rat-brilliant idea.  How about swimming?  Luckily I had my swim trunks and goggles along (I never go to the aquarium without them), and I hopped right in.  And guess who I met there?  A new friend!

The only thing is, I don’t speak Sea Turtle.  And she didn’t speak Rodent.  (Or English, which is my second language.)  She was very friendly, though, and kept trying to talk to me.  Her words sounded like this:  “Bubble bub blub bubbly blubbly blub.” I was almost going to give up and swim away, but then she said “Sooloo”, and pointed with her flipper at herself, and so I said “Ratty”, and pointed with my paw at myself, and all of a sudden we were making up our own sign language!  And most of the time, we managed to understand each other just fine.  So I hung out with Sooloo and she gave me rides on her back, and everything.

It was lots of fun!  Much better than sweating in an old bowling alley, for sure.  At least, it was fun until somebody in a uniform came and scooped me out with a net.  And they told Emmy to never let her rat swim in the exhibits again.

But it was still great to meet Sooloo.  I’m glad we kept trying to talk to each other, even when it was hard at first.  Have you ever met someone who was hard to understand?  What did you do?

February 10th, 2025 by The Rat

Okay, so maybe bowling isn’t my sport.

But hey, I was feeling so much better, and I was so tired of lying in bed all day when I was sick, that I just wanted to get out and DO something, you know?  It’s winter now and no one is playing pawball, but I thought maybe I could try an indoor sport.  Like, say, bowling!  I mean, why not?  What do I have to lose?

Only my dignity.  Only my pride.  Only my image of myself as a rat with muscles.

And I got a brand new bowling shirt, too.  Sometimes life just isn’t fair, you know?  How was I supposed to know the ball weighed about a ratzillion pounds?

Have you ever tried to push a ratzillion pounds down a wooden lane that’s 120 times as long as you are?  No?  You should try it some time.  Seriously.  It will give you a new appreciation for the phrase “maximum effort, minimum gain.”

So, any ideas for what I should try next?  Hmmm?  (I’m thinking of taking up something that doesn’t involve sweating.)

February 7th, 2025 by The Rat

Oh my gosh I feel so AWFUL.  My paws were kind of tired after jumping around on the keyboard, writing to all you kids and Mrs. Walle, and so I had a few peanut butter cups to build up my strength.  Well, maybe I had more than a few.  Maybe I had a LOT.  But then last night my paws started to shake and my little ratty heart went about 600 beats a minute and my ears turned all red and scabby.

As if that wasn’t bad enough, I started to itch all over.  I looked in the mirror and I was covered with SPOTS!  Oh, my aching tail.  I was so worried– what if it was the Ratbonic Plague, or the dreaded SCALY TAIL FEVER?!?

Oh, I feel sick.  And it’s hard to breathe… (gasp! gasp! gasp!)  Am I contagious?  Will everyone want to stay away from me?  What if the spots never go away, and I look like a polka-dotted furball for the rest of my ratty life?

Maybe I need some MORE peanut butter cups!  Yeah, that would cheer me up!

Have YOU ever been sick?  Do you have any good ideas for what might make me feel better?

P.S.  I hope I’m not allergic to peanuts.  Or chocolate.

February 4th, 2025 by The Rat

Hello, all you first, second and third graders in Mrs. Walle’s class!

Why am I combing my fur, you ask?  Well, of course a rodent wants to look his best when he meets some V.C.K.s (Very Cool Kids.)  Notice the ratty bow tie!  And the neatly pressed shirt!  Not to mention the perky ears!  I even used a little hair gel between my ears for that spiky look.  What do you think?  Am I handsome enough to blog with you?

Okay, I’m ready to start jumping around on the keyboard (I like to type with all four paws.)  But I’m just a little tiny bit worried about something…

What if you don’t like rats?  Worse yet, what if you don’t like ME?  (heavy sigh.)

Oh well, if you don’t like me, please just don’t say anything about it.  We rats have very sensitive feelings.  But if you DO like me, hey, I’d like to know!  After all, I DID get all dressed up for you.  Plus, I LOVE to blog.  Do you?

Your friend,

Ratty

P.S.  I hope none of you are cats.